Saturday, February 25, 2006
I noticed that when money gets tight, our social life falls away. Most of the time we met our friends in Pubs, clubs and restaurants. Now we just decline invites because we can't afford it anymore. We also stopped inviting friends over for dinner or brunch.

I didn't realize how much I missed that until last night. We went to "The Fabrik Art" for our friend, K's 25th birthday.

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There I was sitting in the familiar leather booth seats, drinking cold Warsteiner and surrounded by our friends again. It felt good. We needed to get out, laugh and just let go.

We were getting caught in the trap of obsessing over our money problems 24 hours a day. Life was just passing us by and every day was kind of blending into the other. We were becoming Hermits and suffering from mild cabin fever. It didn't help that we had both come down with the flu either.

After the Fabrik Art, we collapsed together on the sofa and watched more of LOST. (For the record, it's our current new favorite show. It's rare that we find a show we both love. I was suffering through his 007 boxset and he suffered through a number of seasons of "Sex in the City")

I ended up falling asleep on the sofa in the middle of an episode, and I woke up to Eric gently nudging me awake. I just moaned "Just leave me here..." and rolled over.

At that point I felt his arms around me, gently lifting up my weight. I buried my head in the crook of his neck and he carried me to bed. I was in an out of sleep as he changed me into my pajamas and tucked me in. He gave me a soft kiss and whispered "I love you" Then he climbed under the covers and pulled me close.

I opened my eyes in the darkness and smiled. I could tell from his breathing that he was already fast asleep. I love him with an intensity I can't even describe. I can't even remember what my life was like before he came into my world. But he's the best thing that ever happened to me.


This morning we went to MarktKauf to recycle some bottles and buy some food. During the walk, we stopped to look up at the trees.

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We watched the branches sway slowly in the soft breeze. These trees were so old and seemed to contain so much wisdom.

"These trees were around back when the Ravensbergs fought with the French", Eric observed squinting from the sunlight and gazing up. "So much least 300 years old. At some point, all of this was just forest."

We just stood there, holding hands. It was a really peaceful moment and everything kind of fell away.

Not much happened today, but I felt completely relaxed. Possibly for the first weeks. I've wasted way too much time worrying about certain circumstances out of my control.

I have to log off, we're leaving in 20 minutes to go out to a nightclub. There is no admission cost before 10, so even with no money.. we can still go out and dance with our friends. The saying is true, Money doesn't buy happiness.
posted by Clarity25 at 3:25 PM |


At February 25, 2006, Anonymous alice 

When Im really really broke and friends invite me out I get a water bottle and put some vodka in it and put it in my bag. (obviously this doesnt work if they do a bag check..although sometimes they will let it go.)
Then I order maybe one mixed drink and after that just soda and add my vodka under the table!
Im glad your getting out, its good for both of you! Nothing causes tension more than cabin fever!

At February 25, 2006, Anonymous Sarah 

I'm glad you're going out and having a good time. you deserve it!

At February 26, 2006, Anonymous aut 

your friends better buy you guys lots of drinks! i sure the hell would. honestly, today i was thinking if i knew your address i would send you guys $ --with no return address so you HAD to keep it-- and the card would say, "MUST USE TO DRINK A LOT AND DANCE A LOT!" it seems lately you guys really need that!

At February 26, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous 

I really liked those tree photographs.

At February 26, 2006, Blogger Nightmare 

This is why I like perscription drugs! I get a buzz for a hell of a lot cheaper then a cover charge and the price of getting my drunk on!

Well even hanging out with friends beats sulking and wallowing in self pity at the flat! Keep in mind the walk you took and the feelings you had, those are always free and the memories will last longer than the memories of not having.

At February 26, 2006, Anonymous Mary 

That's great that you've been able to relax a bit. Financial problems can really cause a great deal of stress and health problems. Make sure you take care of yourself.